Forward by J. Saman

Author:J. Saman [Saman, J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Pronoun
Published: 2017-04-26T04:00:00+00:00

“Of course. Chocolate chip or oatmeal raisin?” I ask, before holding up my hand. “You know what? I’m going to get an assortment of yummy goodies. I think we’re gonna need it.” I wave off the five-dollar bill that she’s holding out to me and start walking back towards the lobby, Levi in tow.

19

“I didn’t know you were interested in surgery,” I tell Levi when we’re out of hearing range. “I’m sorry for being a total shit and not asking before.”

He smiles. “It’s fine. We’ve had a lot of other things to talk about.”

“Congrats on the interviews. That’s awesome.” I swipe my badge and the doors swing open. I’m blasted with cold air and the smell of the waiting room. It definitely has its own unique funk that I’d rather not think too deeply on. “Surgery, though.” I shake my head. “You’ll have no free time. What about Tanya?” I ask him, genuinely curious. “Yo, coffee run, you guys want anything?” I call out to Catherine, Olivia and Jose who are still glued to the TV.

“Nah, we’re good. Just went,” Jose calls back, holding up his coffee. I nod at him, walking in the opposite direction of where they’re located.

“Tanya is fifteen now. It’s a lot to ask of her, but she’s the one who pushed me to do it. I was going to do family medicine or anesthesia–which is still an option–so I could be home with her more, but she reminded me that she’s not a baby and that she can handle it.”

I look at him surprised. “Wow, that’s incredible.”

He smiles indulgently. “Yeah, she is. We have a housekeeper, for lack of a better word, who stays with us. She does a lot for, and with, Tanya. Tanya’s best friend also lives next door and her mother is a saint, so that helps.”

I shake my head incredulous. “You’re a parent, Levi. I mean, I know she’s your younger sister and all, but still. You’re raising her.” I smile, nudging him with my shoulder. “I’m so proud of you.”

He smiles huge, nudging me back. “So, we’re good with the friends thing?” he asks nervously, but there is something else in his eyes that I can’t quite place. Regret maybe? I don’t know what he’s expecting me to say. No, I’m not? I want you and Tom, both at the same time.

Clearly that is not a possibility.

I’ve chosen Tom.

Levi has chosen friendship so there is nothing left to say.

“I’m not gonna lie to you, Levi,” I say, swerving to avoid a wheel-chaired patient. “It’s weird being your friend. Especially after all this time.”

“Does that mean you don’t want to be?”

I glance over at him and his expression tells me he doesn’t like this idea.

“No.” I shake my head as we turn the corner and get in line behind two other doctors in lab coats checking their phones. “I want to be your friend. I’m just not sure I know how. It’s a learning curve for me.”

“I don’t want to lose you again Lara.

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